Close to seven years had elapsed when I met with an old time friend. The salutations were warm, pretty warm, and to my surprise on her finger was a ring. This was no engagement ring because at the look of things something was definitely cooking. We got to have a sit-down and exchanged how our lives’ had been for the past years we hadn’t seen each other. In front of us was my book “VICTORY IN PRAYER,” I gladly shared what the Lord had been working in my life. You could see the excitement on her face as she purchased a copy and promised to read it. I was overjoyed as you can imagine the impact of having one person buying your book and giving you a right hand of fellowship in all that the Lord is leading you to. I do recall being a bit disappointed though from the previous meeting I just had, a sudden joy elapsed from my spirit as I prayed, “Father, if this is the reason why I came, then so be it, thank you.” Meeting with her had just made my day. Getting to hear how she had been after all the years we were apart, one thing really stood out clear, she was BUILDING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS, AND NOT COMPROMISING ONES.


She was duly married as she brought me to speed on how it had been for her thus far. She also shared something that I had to concur with her, she said that God is more pleased with a marriage commitment rather than a dating relationship. This statement is very debatable depending on which side you are on and how you look at things, but let’s just leave it at that. I didn’t  know much about her history, past relationships or anything of the sought, but I was sure that she was more geared on BUILDING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS, AND NOT COMPROMISING ONES.

She had committed to being with someone instead of just hanging on to samples until the procurement exercise comes to an end. I remember her telling me that a lot of what people call dating today is quite ungodly and doesn’t bring honor to God in any way.


Personally, I happen to know quite a lot of individuals, most of them believers. But it is sad to note how many aren’t ready to take any step towards a healthy relationship due to what may have happened in their past in a compromising relationship. We compromised on our likes and dislikes, on our passions and desires, thus ended up giving up to just anything so as not to be apart from that ‘special someone.’ It’s so sad to see how many don’t even have a desire for marriage or a godly spouse. Something that I’m sure can be attributed to what may have happened in their lives from a past compromising relationship. Due to all that may have occurred in the past, there has been such a profound quench to all that the Lord has set for us to find great pleasure and honor, marriage. I recall sharing this in one of our fellowships, and you could see the deliverance upon each and everyone’s face upon hearing this. You could look at how we all needed help in this area. I remember the Lord sharing that we ought to focus on the marriage union, and not like who is this ‘special someone’ going to be. Many people concentrate on finding that someone and asking who it would be, whereas very few are even concerned about the union that this is meant to bring; thus the reason why even after finding that someone or anyone, very few last to a union. Thus instead of working towards building healthy relationships, many tend to compromise just to keep that special one.

If you ain’t ready for marriage, please, first focus on building healthy relationships.

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Kedenge Arnold

Arnold Kedenge is called of God in Jesus Christ to manifest His Heart for all His creation to see and be changed to His form, in Jesus Name. Arnold is a published author and content creator living in Nairobi Kenya where he works as a publisher.

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